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Home » Parenting

How I almost drowned a swim teacher today

Sunday, 5 November 2006 Comments »

The boys had their (last, as it turns out) swim lessons this morning. We're not a big 'lessons' family, but somehow Mike and Robbie are both doing gymnastics and swimming lessons every week.

New swim teacher today, and I see her trying to make Mike put his head under water. He was born scared of the water, and all I want is for him to learn to enjoy it. And that is what had been going on before today.

I called her over and told her not to make him do it. She gives the this BS about how unless he learns this he'll never learn to swim. (Nice to say in front of him, right?)

She also says that this is a nice safe place for him to learn it. Mike is crying and clinging to her and telling her he really doesn't want to do it. I asked her if it looked like HE thought it was a nice safe place. She agreed that he did not.

But then she keeps arguing with me. Turns out she is the new Director of the swim school and clearly was trying to prove something to me. About children's swimming lessons. Ass.

Just as I was about to reach in and take the boys out of the water, and then reach down her throat and relieve her of her lungs, she said "Well, you are paying for the lessons" and "Well, they are your kids". So I let her live and teach for the remaining 10 minutes. She should consider herself lucky.

  • Oh, The Joys said:

    Gah! Director, shmirector.

    p.s. LOVED The No. 1 Ladies series!

    5 November 2006 at 5:59 pm
  • Plain Jane Mom said:

    Yeah, and they have a web site to sign up for all the classes, and it was lovely to just click 'delete delete delete'! No fuss, no muss.

    And I'm liking the book so far. Glad to hear a positive recommendation!

    5 November 2006 at 6:45 pm
  • nyjlm said:

    Ooooh, that is such a pet peeve of mine! I saw the swim director at our YMCA forcing a kid to put his head underwater this summer. She's very lucky he wasn't my child. My son (now 7) has always hated getting his face wet. Something clicked with him this summer and now he's a swimming fool. I'm so glad we didn't push him and that he figured it out on his own.

    5 November 2006 at 8:40 pm
  • Flo-Queen of the Bad Mommies said:

    Was this at the Fear and Humiliation Academy of Swimming? I am familiar with them-they must be a chain.

    But seriously-you want me to go kick her ass? Just thought I'd ask.

    6 November 2006 at 7:16 am
  • Plain Jane Mom said:

    She was like those awful hairdressers who get an assistant to hold a crying child down while they cut their hair.

    We walked out of a haircut with half of Mike's hair un-cut one time. This horrible woman was just so mean. No wonder my kids were crying.

    I really hate having to apologize to my kids for allowing them to be around assholes, but I figure it is a good lesson for them about being cautious around strangers.

    6 November 2006 at 10:25 am
  • imhelendt said:

    I taught swim lessons for 12 years. There is no circumstance where you have to force a crying child under water to make them learn. It can be done with the child thinking it was THEIR idea and liking it. Trust me. Find a better teacher….

    7 November 2006 at 5:26 pm
  • Plain Jane Mom said:

    imhelendt — I couldn't agree more! We stopped going to that school and we'll find another place in the Spring.

    10 November 2006 at 12:07 pm

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