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naptime
Do you ever feel like you have chronic fatigue? Not the kind with capital letters, just the regular, old fucking tired all the time kind? That's what I have and I just can't shake it.
"Not right now Robbie, mommy is passed out on the couch." Ever tried to nap while your kids are running around? I knew I was really tired when learned that I could sleep in 15 second increments.
Wake to Mike saying "Mommy, why are you sleeping" and mumble something incoherent and hopefully free of hilariously repeatable words.
20 seconds later wake to the sound of blood curdling screaming. Determine it is an "I'm pissed off" noise and not an "I'm being dismembered" noise and fall back asleep.
A blissful 2 minutes later wake to the sensation of being poked. And not in a good way. Open eyes to see a paper airplane milliseconds before it enters your cornea. Yell something incoherent, and fall asleep again.
Have enough remaining spidey-sense left to be woken by the sound of someone outside conspiratorially whispering "I bet we can do it…". Look outside window to see newest inventive children's game being played. Step 1: throw small toy on top of patio umbrella until it gets stuck there. Step 2: dislodge it by throwing a GARDEN SHOVEL up at it.
Become fully awake approximately 5 minutes after running outside and snatching a garden tool out of the air just before it cleaves someone's head in two.
Anyone know the name of a good babysitter?
I'm convinced if I could only save up enough for a week at Miraval, all this sleep deprivation will come to an end. Maybe 2026.
Thanks for reminding me that as she gets older…it will only get worse.
I actually thought it would get better once my kids were "sleeping through the night" but like "sleeping like a baby" that phrase is seriously overused!
On any given night someone will:
- have a nightmare
- lose a teddy bear
- have a pullup-overflow
- wake up and want to play
Or I will:
- have a nightmare
- lose a pillow
- need to pee
- OK, I never wake up and want to "play"
And so on. So in my experience it gets better, but I never get a full week of full nights sleep. (Does that sound like I want to sleep for a week? Good!) Definitely better than the early days of waking every two hours, but I don't think I'll catch up on my sleep until hmmm… Need to do math here… Whenever 17 years from now is.
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